A Young Man Caught Me In His Arms: A Tribute to My Amazing Mother

May is the month to honor mothers and mother figures. Being a mother myself, I can attest to the depth and challenge of the experience. I can think of moments of which I am assuredly not proud. And to a feeling of gratitude for the wonderful people my daughters Sierra and Freya have become.

I am grateful to live near my own mom. Recently, she came over for dinner and told a story that I find to be emblematic of her modeling. She had traveled from San Francisco to New York City to spend the weekend treating Sierra and Freya to a special getaway with “Mormor” as she is called by all of her grandchildren. (“Mormor” is a Norwegian word, meaning “mother’s mother.”)

Mom spent the weekend with my girls shopping, eating and going to the theater. After they left to go back to their respective colleges, she stayed an extra couple of days to visit museums. At one of the museums, she was walking up a flight of stairs, had a moment of dizziness and startled to careen backwards and downwards.

”I would have had a terrible fall,” she reported, “but a young man caught me in his arms. After that, I had a wonderful day with no further problems.”

”That’s amazing!” I reacted.

“Yes,” she affirmed in a tone of voice she might have used while describing a magical dream. “He caught me in his arms.”

I love this story because it shows so much about my mom. Her adventurousness. Her commitment to family. Her generosity. Her resilience. Her determination to live life lovingly and fully.

Mormor the Adventurer

My mom has always been an active and engaged grandmother. But this trip to New York City took massive amounts of planning and effort. She spent weeks planning every aspect of their time together. And though she is exceptionally fit and spry at the age of 83, air travel is never easy. She arrived just in time to serve up the perfect chicken soup for the soul as one of the girls was going through her first significant break-up.

Mormor the Resilient

It’s amazing to me that, after what could have been a treacherous fall, she just picked up and continued with her day so easily. After all, she had not had a dizzy spell like this before. Instead of worrying about whether or not it might happen again, she just got up, brushed herself off and immersed herself in the experience of being in the museums. This is just the way she has picked herself up after several major losses in her life. She has kept on keepin’ on. She has a vibrant community of friends. She remains the true hub of the family. She’s off to French group. To book club. To the symphony or opera. To an art show. Never taking anything for granted or too seriously. And always taking the time to show her loved ones how much they matter to her.

Mormor the Optimist

Mormor truly believes in the fundamental goodness of people and in the possibility that each moment might bring something wonderful and new. She knows how to live with joy. She has shown several times that you can grieve the loss of a loved one and still enjoy your life. This is not denial. It is the benefit of a commitment to thriving with deep investment in good friends, rewarding work, and family.

Mom’s optimism is contagious. She continually shows her belief in us. In our goodness and in our ability to find our way. And when we feel that, we feel less anxiety, more confidence to take risks, more joy.

Being More Like Mormor

I recently was feeling anxious about an inordinate amount of international travel I have been doing this spring. “I’m a home body,” I kept telling people, trying to explain why I found the travel plans to be stressful. Then I realized that I could take my mother’s attitude and trust that, should it get difficult, metaphorically speaking, a young man would catch me in his arms. With that attitude, the anxiety receded and each trip has been truly wonderful.

Most recently, I returned from Japan, where, among other things, I spent a fabulous week together with my mom and husband. Luckily there were no falls or other mishaps. I just got to witness my mom in action and enjoy our connection. What a wonderful way to live, knowing that should you fall, you will be safely caught, protected from harm.